or have you heard similar conversations as this in your own household…
Me - laying in bed, sad
Family Member - "What’s wrong?"
Me - "I’m not exactly sure, lots of things I guess"
Family Member - "I don’t like seeing you sad, what can I do?"
Me - "Well if you would just give me a hug or hold my hand, listen to me, and respond when I ask a question, that would probably help a lot."
Family Member - “Well, I’ve got a lot of stuff to do, can this wait?”
I was just wondering how many of us this has happened to, and how often 
It’s disheartening at times to actually be able to verbalize what we want or need, and then not get it.
Though depression is a HUGE struggle, and I know it’s no one’s fault, I feel it’s often times made more difficult when people “say” they want to help us or make it better, but then can not / will not stick around through the extremely difficult parts, or don’t want to discuss those things that may help make us better. I can’t just “leave” or “ignore” my depression - it never goes away, and doesn’t get better
I wish we truly meant every good, nice, decent word we say (and had the ability to not say mean things!), and stuck with all great promises we make, but human nature being what it is, there are too many elements in the mix that can change what we mean, or mess up the promises we have made.
Isn’t it weird? Communication is key - and yet depression often ruins that part for us, but when we actually regain it, we sometimes don’t get to use it after all.
Odd.
Well here is a big HUG to you, I have had this conversation before and it hurts.
Punky, I promise, I won’t make you wait. hugs, gramms
OH Punkster,
My heart is with you girl. I wonder and ask things myself, they just aren’t as important to others I suppose. Wish I was there I’d listen and brew some lovely smelling tea, and we’d sit with blankets tucked around us on the sofa and talk and cry and laugh till the tea was gone and we both felt content and validated.
You are important, your words are important, your feelings are important, and you deserve to be heard. Try a new tactic. I’ve heard men are more receptive when participating in some form of movement. Sitting down to talk can cause some to just assume a defensive posture. Go for a walk and then just start talking. Perhaps it might make it easier. Just a suggestion! smile more later by message.
Maybe that’s just what we all need - a little cozy time, with laughter and tears, and some tea, and lots of talk, and things will just move forward from there 
Maybe my feeling lonely and alone can be conquered simply by knowing I am not alone in anything, really, it’s just a nasty little feeling I get sometimes! So that’s what I will work on this moment
I AM SENDING YOU TONS OF HUGS PUNKY. THEY COME STRAIGHT FROM THE
HEART…NOT BECAUSE I HAVE TO BUT BECAUSE I WANT TO. THAT’S EVEN BETTER.
SAMMI
I sure do know what you mean. My husband used to listen, but he gave it up awhile back. Now I’m pretty stuck. Sometimes I do vent here, but it only helps if someone answers. So I’m answering. Message me anytime.
I just want you all to know how very much I appreciate your responses, and how I, too, am willing to listen We’ll listen to each other and that is good therapy
Punky, Realize that the past can never change but the future and present is open to new possibilities and opportunities. Know that “YOU” can not control the actions of other peoples bodies, minds or energies. There’s absolutely no reason to ever blame yourself for someone else’s actions you could not and can not change! When “we” work on ourselves “we” continue fixing problems.You’r healing will be found. You will heal. I say, go live. You are what your mother has left behind to carry her energy and her message forward. But don’t waste your energy worrying your plane is going to go down when in reality, it’s crash-proof,little sistah. Who loves ya? Hmm… We depressives can be downright frustrating. We see everything in absolute terms, no gray areas. We set high standards for ourselves and when they aren’t met, we can’t accept it.I’m writing this as someone who’s been on both sides of the fence and can now appreciate the pain of both the depressed and the people who seek to help the depressed. Kindness is the fifth fruit of the Spirit, the one that comes after love, joy, peace, and patience.“For the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law.” In times of crisis & depression, I’ve worked exceptionally hard to stick with the first four, never feeling able to move beyond that giant stumbling block, patience. But now seems like a perfect time to add kindness to my long list. I value kindness, in myself and others. We think of friends (relationships/marriages/relatives/co-workers etx) as positive relationships in our lives. Yet that is NOT always true. Avoid, end, or mend friend-relaltionships who are harmful to you Punky. 
I was fortunate enough to find one more person in our world who is genuinely kind and caring, its just one more piece of evidence that proves, that there are still good people out there,who truly care ~ and that One Person …Is YOU. I Love ya, ~ Jade ~
Oh Jade - the tears are flowing, but you have said just the things I needed to hear, and I thank you dearly for that
And, to your statement ~ “ I was fortunate enough to find one more person in our world who is genuinely kind and caring, its just one more piece of evidence that proves, that there are still good people out there,who truly care ~ and that One Person …Is YOU. :)” RIGHT BACK ATCHA SISTAH!!! Because I consider myself very lucky each and every day to have found you - actually, I think I found Rizzo, and then you found me, but it’s all good
I thank everyone who has responded to this topic, and any that I have posted or been involved in since my first day here… often times, you are the only people who are listening and responding to me, and I surely appreciate it!!!
It’s good to have help, hope, friends, and fun - I think we provide that to each other
i just wish i had someone to ‘pretend’ to listen.
I read and listen to the forums / threads that I have time to read and listen to… I never pretend. I think that’s true for everyone here, really.
I appreciate all responses I get, both in the forum and privately, and know that many times, others are feeling just like me - overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, and unable to provide what everyone else wants and needs.
I think we’re all doing our very best - hang in there Con.
I’m listening too, Punky. The only thing is I can’t respond because I have to use my cell phone and I can’t respond. I log on from work and it is so busy and there is so much going on at CAREPLACE,that I just print things and take them home to read them. I do respond to private messages at work if I have time or at the library which is where I am now. Also, CON, I am listening to you too. I am not only pretending. I hear ya. Keep talking.
Thank you Shannon - your response was perfect Sometimes, just every now and again, I believe we all forget it’s not just us!!! I try to always, always keep that in mind, but sometimes, what I want / need is more or different than people have to offer, and that’s okay too!
Life comes with obstacles. Obstacles that must be pursued , unfortunately! No matter how rough the obstacle. You will succeed by trying your best. Failure does not exist because YOU try Punky! Taking “one day at a time.” You cannot change the past; the best is yet to come. The present is now, focus and work on the present. Peacefulness from within your soul will follow in you’r future, you’r the bravest fighter Punkrockgirl * Hell Ya ~ … You inspire “me” every day , I often think about you’r hardships ,pains , emotional battle scars , physical aches & illnesses , and you’re trudging along because you Fight !! And I shrink from what you’ve been through… for a moment , then I think about how many doors, mountains and walls you’ve knocked down and you’ve conquered so much sistah you really have! The longer we’ve been friends the more I feel blessed to be part of you , we have shared so much of our lives “together” , I love who you are I wouldn’t change a thangg …"besides… 1 exception - I’d love to sit on the sofa with you ^ and your hot cocoa, So, back to my point of statement ~ ") I dig you girl ! … "life is challenging . . . I’m here for you ~ and you know I am. AlwAys.
Love Jade ~
Oh Jade, my sweet, sweet, loving, wonderful, fantastic soul sister - a year in my life is NOTHING compared to a day in your life with chronic illnesses (and other things unmentioned) that try to destroy your body and mind - and soul! You have been through more than most anyone I have ever known, and YOU, dear, are the FIGHTER! You NEVER give up, you NEVER give in, you may withdraw your troops to regain some strength, but then you FULL ON BATTLE AGAIN! You inspire me, I am in awe of you… it is with you and for you that I continue on at the moments when I think “geez, that’s it, I’m done here…” I stop and think wait “What would Jade do? She wouldn’t let anyONE beat her - she wouldn’t let anyTHING beat her - she would keep on keepin’ on”… and that’s what I do!
So, we are the Presidents of each other’s fan clubs, and we are the rocks in each other’s lives, and we are the ears to each other’s souls… and we keep on keepin’ on… and we are all about the P.D.A. Here are HUGS, and here are KISSES, and here are LOVING SQUEEZES… all designed to keep you safe and comfortable and to let you know YOU ARE LOVED!
I love you, my sweet friend, and so many people here, there, and beyond, love us and we must always keep that in mind through these awfully trying times… we are loved and we are LOVE!
We’re a tribal society, despite how uncivil we can sometimes be to each other. It’s our heritage, our legacy. We’re in it 'together'… so being lonely (or alone for some folks) is something seemingly incongruous to human nature. But we need to know we’re able to handle it, and so few of us ever really try to learn if we can.We sometimes fail to see how much society conditions us to need the approval of others – from report cards as kids, job reviews as adults, and every fucking time we use our debit cards, it’s all about getting approval. When you’re laying there .. and you're alone, who’s there to give it to you? Who’s there to tell you in the night that everything’s going to be all right?You. Just you. Me. ;) 'Cos I'm your friend Punky!! So many people are self-contained, but everything about our society tells us we’re not. It’s a struggle. It’s hard.
Never underestimate the difficulty of going through the hilltops and feeling torn down and wiped out, you'll always endure the struggles and hurtships 'because you're "Courageous" , and you know who needs you in life!! But also, never ever underestimate the wonder of making it work ,there's a reason for the path you're on RIGHT NOW. I do believe.
There is nothing more rewarding than that night when you realize there’s no one in the world that could make you feel better than you feel right then, right there. Loneliness will always find you, though, but it will always leave you, too. It’s like a tide. It ebbs, it flows, and you just need to find the rhythm.
Love you gurl - xxx Jade
Jade - I’ve read your heartfelt words, and I’ve found my rhythm… so come dance with me That’s HOW to make it work… we’ll dance and be silly and laugh until none of the rest matters anymore… so, join me in a dance - we’ll outdance the devil and he won’t know what hit him - I’m sick of hell in the hallway, so I’m (two-)stepping on its face!
Who’s with me?
Count your booties I'm totally in. :)