Wondering if anyone has a child with aarskog and is also autistic? We are in the beginnings of having our son tested - because we know he is fairly intelligent - we are leaning to high functioning autism. He is having great difficulty at social life at school and he really fits the description to HFA.
Hi MummyTO2,
I am in Australia also. My 15 year old son has struggled through his school life, in Kindergarten it was decided that he had High Functioning Aspergers. By late primary level we began the process t o have him formally recognized with Aspergers. The psychologist tested him and said at the time that his problem solving skills were actually ay a year 9 level, he was in year 6 at the time. However his communication skills were several years behind as were his leteracy and numeracy skills. IN short he was an intelligent boy who coulod not comminicate this to people.
Early in his life he suffred badly with self esteem issues. He found it difficult to fit in and either was drawn to children with behavioural issues who also struggled with acceptance or allowed himself to be treated poorly to be accepted.
At the time financial hardship left me with zero options as far accessing any type of assistance.My marriage had broken down and i was raising my children alone. My only choice was to support my son myself. I simply talked to him, when he was depressed i talked to him endlessly, building his self esteem, explaining frienship and peer pressure, and about teaching people how to repect you by repecting yourself. I tutored him with his school work. I encouraged his friendships outside of school by offering play dates and befriending other mothers. I worked to enhance his strengths and made light of his weaknesses. I have had more than my fair share of heated debates with school teachers who lacked skill or empathy or simple interest and worshipped the few that championed him and took him on as a challenge.
Most importantly i have had amazing faimly support, i have taught my children to be close and supportive of each other, that blood is thicker than water, to accept others for the diversity they bring into our lives in the hope that they accept us for ours. I found that getting my children involved in as many community groups and activities as possible and also being involved was invaluable in developing social skills and networks.
Smaller schools are better, they offer less competition, generally more teacher student interaction. Religious or not i found that a Christian School taught the principles of mutual respect and acceptance which lessened the possibility of exclusion. Strict uniform policies aid in reinforcing uniformity in general, this may sound as though i do not value individuality, i certainly do, but in an environment where your child may be made vulnerable by their differences, uniform reinforces the illusion that everyone is the same. Tutors have helped, i have found it is not the lesson itself that my son doesnt understand but the method in which it is delivered is not the best method for him. Finding a tutor that your child is at ease with is a great move.
My son will go to school until he is old enough to move onto a Tafe course where he can begin to learn a trade. He is not going to be a brain surgeon or a Professor but what he does chose will be some thing he excells in. He is also very focused on topics that interest him and has zero interest in anything else. He is obsessive about computer games, computers and has zero fear regarding most things. He has a high tollerance for pain and an excellent immune system. He has a unique sense of humour and a healthy vitality. He is very athletic but has no concept of competition. He enjoys himself in the moment.
It has been a most interesting upbringing and i have often felt as though my children were a little different but i dont see it as in any negative way. I hope this has been of some help. It hasnt always been easy but we take one day at a time. We have got this far without knowing about the AS, we only found out 2 months ago. Once we discovered it, it all fell into place. Please feel free to contact me if you need some one to chat to, the road doesnt have to be a lonley one!
Tess