I had a few months ago asked members about their experiences with EMDR and so glad I did since it has turned out to be of benefit to me.
I was wondering now what other alternative therapies you have had measures of success with. In particular I’m wondering about eastern medicine, naturopathy, meditation, spirituality, prayer.
I too did EMDR and found it to be enourmously helpful.  I am only a month into all of this.  I am reading a lot. Seeing my therapist, attending church again and talking things out with friends.  I find journaling helpful too.
-----Original Message-----
From: ThePhoenixxx npd-cpt10095@lists.careplace.com
To: ladyleelee911@aol.com
Sent: Mon, 18 Aug 2008 9:06 pm
Subject: [npd] alternative therapies
I heard EMDR makes you cry a lot. That’d be a good thing for me.
I found spirituality very helpful in my own healing. But really, I never bought into one completely. My healing was a combination of many different sources that I pieced together.
Some of the most helpful sources frightened me quite a bit. When things seem to work, I’d get this overwhelming felling that there was something cultish about it so I’d shy away. There were concepts in them that did away with some of my pain.
Having lots of tools available is a great idea, and I wouldn’t have found some of them if people hadn’t shared what worked for them.
I dont cry as much engaged in EMDR as I did in traditional therapy. But its specifically focussing on the painful traumas and losses of life.
So what things did work for you WYouth?
I’m wanting to support the changes I’ve got going with as many buttresses as I can.
Therapy helped a little, but I didn’t spend much time there or invest much into it. It helped to have somebody confirm and validate my experience until I became strong enough to do it on my own.
Support groups helped strengthen that further. The biggest bonus of that was jsut knowing that I wasn’t alone. When I thought I was so alone and dealing with things nobody would understand, I eventually ran across thousands of stories of people going through the exact same things.
The groups also helped me gain knowledge, and understanding was important. I was less lost and confused when I could put a name to what I was going through.
And spirituality. I took things from Attitudinal Healing to Buddhism. Things like “It is the understanding that we are not only responsible for our thoughts, we are also responsible for the feelings we experience.” It not about accepting blame or fault for what happens to us. My ex made me misrable and unhappy. All along I had the power to leave and create my own experience free of that and with positive things. I spent a lot of time blaming my ex and feeling bad when I could have been creating a positive experience elsewhere.
Hmmmmm…I never considered prayer to be an “alternative therapy”. To me when I pray it’s a conversation with my Lord. But I do consider it to be the “best medicine”!
I found the holistic approach useful…mind-body-spirit.
I think a broken"spirit needs healing as music as the mind itself.
Taoism has been valuable to me…as has my belief in God.
A wonderful psychiatrists belief in vitamin C therapy was also priceless
As regards conventional therapies…I found that people-centered counseling was wonderful…with its use of Rogerian methods…positive regard validation ect…and i was lucky enough to have a brilliant counsellor…who was very warm hearted, open and humorous.
I just wanted to add that I went through EMDR for some of my childhood/adolescent traumas. I had only done a few sessions and my T was aprehensive to continue when I wasn’t in a stable environment because it can be difficult for some people. (this was right around the time i met my N so things were very wonderful/horrible= not stable)
I will say though that the issues we tackled with it are much more dull now. I still think of them every once in a while, but honestly my perception is much less distorted and I feel less guilt and self-blame from them. It really works for overcoming traumas. For the few sessions I had I feel like my perceptions are much more clear and I no longer blame myself in those situations.
Perhaps I will try again once I get into a stable environment. It feels like I’ve been stuck in this tornado for sooo long now…
EMDR did help me as did tradtional therapy. I didn’t even know what NPD was or that it even existed until my therapist pointed out to me what he is. Prayer also helps me. I try to pamper myself a bit. Long soaks in the tub, renting a movie I’ve been wanting to see, talking to friends, keeping a journal. Some times all I can do is have a good cry and let some more of that pain out. It seems like it comes out in parcels. I’m not constantly horrified anymore, just some of the time. It still hurts like all get out. Friends keep telling me that a year from now all of this will look different. I hope so.
I had a reiki session the other day. It was a friend of mine, who practices reiki, chrystal therapies and animal comunication.
At the very begining, when she had her hands above my forehead (it was no contact until she did my back) I go this rapid eye movement and tears. i thought I might blubber all the way through, but although i had slight rapid eye movement and near tears a couple of times, the tears stopped.
Apart from that, i was pretty disappointed with it, and I think my friend was disappointed that i did not feel somehow wonderful afterwards.
But it made me wonder if I maybe need some stronger medicine at this point in my life. As i told you last week, i went to councelling/threrapy and told my story for most of the time and was then asked what I hope to get from counselling. I just did not know how to answer that. I thought it was pretty obvious, I need help!!
I have people to talk to. I have this board to rant and vent on. I dont think I will go back to that thereapist/counsellor, despite having made an appointment, on the kind of it cant do any harm theory. I will try another reiki session, cos it cant do any harm right? And it intersted me to read about EMDR there and that its got to do with rapid eye movement, which is what involuntarilly happpened 5 seconds in to reiki - I dont know why! So i have just emailed an EMDR thereapist, who practices right round the corner from me for an appointment. Cant do any harm, and you know what, it is cheaper than the therapist/counsellor, which I think is interesting!
I’d recommend EMDR over any crystal therapies any day; one is based on science and case studies and one isn’t scientifically proven. I’m a serious skeptic. And, I’m not saying this to insult anybodies beliefs, so sorry for that in advance. If you don’t like that advice just don’t listen to me, do what works for you.
I really hope that your friends are right too about things looking different a year from now. Sometimes it is so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. In fact, sometimes I feel like I am completely fumbling around in the darkness with no light at all.
Deep down I know that God allows us to suffer because eventually we will grow and serve a greater purpose because of our lesson we learned from the suffering, but sometimes it just feels like meaningless punishment.
My wishy washy mind feels like a punishment sometimes. My weakness to him and to his “sweetness” even though it is completely phony.
lelee, i meant to put in my message that you are most definitely not alone in this fight. I am sorry about that. I got into beating myself up and realized after I reread what I wrote that I probably made you feel worse rather than better about the situation.