Hi Diana,
I’m bip, and I have bipolar too. I have been diagnosed since '92. I have never been in the hospital bkz of it, but not sure I shouldn’t of been at times; but when you have no insurance, that really isn’t an option, so you trudge on the best way you can with the therapy and counselors that are willing to help you. Thankfully, down through the years I have had pretty good counselors and meds.
Coping with being bipolar isn’t always easy. But on the positive, I was so GLAD to find out there was something wrong with me. It gave me a REASON as to why I done some of the stuff I had done in '85; and when I was a teen, trying suicide three different times. And in the '60’s there wasn’t any the understanding that there is now.
My husb. sometimes wishes I could go back to where I was when he met me, manic! manic for 6 months; but then on the other hand he sees me as doing so much better, except my sleep. He also doesn’t see me as depressed as I was; however, our own situation is so much better now, and that really does help with the depression. Not that it takes it all away, but it does make it better.
We can always find happiness, when we accept the problem. We may not like the problem, but when we acknowledge it, accept it, then we have something to work with, and problems are able to be solved once we know there is one. They may not be able to be solved or rectified completely, but usually they can be worked with to a better conclusion then the one we had before we knew the problem. (sorry, does that make any sense at all? lol)
Any way, Diana, be grateful that your husband is willing to learn about your illness. That will benefit you in the long run. Don’t worry about your family not accepting your illness. YOu are the one that has to deal with it in your head, and your husband is the one that has to deal with the behavior and bills, and if your family doesn’t want to accept your illness,then the hell with them. You know what you have to do for yourself, and your husband knows, now. Your family doesn’t want to look at themselves and see if maybe they have a problem too. BP is usually inhereited, even from generations in the past. Mine was! Also if there is any drug/alcohol addictions in the family in any way, that could be a symptom of BP. We usually self-medicate. Many BP’s do. I did. I have ten years of sobriety now, so I also understand that end of it as well. I’d get depressed, and get drunk. I’d get mad, and get drunk. I’d get my feelings hurt, esp. the feelings hurt, I’d
get drunk. I’d get tired of the evey day grind of working, I’d get drunk, finally, I didn’t need a reason to be drunk. I got drunk because I liked being drunk, the taste, smell, behavior, evey thing. I miss it yet! But not enough to throw away 10 yrs. either.
Any way, sorry this got so long! But I’m bipolar what can I say? We like to ramble, and ramble I did. (lol)
Talk to me again, if you aren’t afraid of me rambling, again! lol
bip
PS. You will find a lot of understanding and support in CP; it has been my life line at times!
TOMORROWS RAINBOW
"THOSE WHO DESERVE TO BE LOVED THE LEAST, NEEDS IT THE MOST, and sometimes that means ourselves"
----- Original Message ----
From: ittybitty50 bipolar-cpt7066@lists.careplace.com
To: ikesrecovery59@yahoo.com
Sent: Sunday, December 9, 2007 10:46:34 AM
Subject: Re: [bipolar] Am I paranoid ?
