Check-up from the Neck Up

Narcissistic personality disorder
#1

Good Morning! Fall is in the air - it’s a time of year that feels fresh and new - much like spring. It’s a time of year when I feel alive and happy and optimistic. But, it’s also a time of year that I really miss having a man close - who knows why - snuggling factor, maybe? But, I don’t miss my N!!

I would like everyone here to share with us a positive affirmation about themselves and here’s why - I have seen huge growth in everyone here - huge! - in just the past week really. I think it gets lost in the shuffle of numerous posts though. Even lurkers, share - let’s all feel good about where we ARE, not where we AREN’T.

I know I am a pretty cool gal - for 53, I can run circles around most 30 year olds! I am blessed with 3 extraordinary kids who are all happy and successful - THAT’S what’s most important to me. I am thankful to have found out about this disorder, I thank God for making me strong enough to deal with it all, and I thank each and every one of you for sharing and helping me to open my eyes and understand that I can’t help him. I feel optimistic again about my future and, though I’m a bit lonely now, I know that I will have the relationship I deserve in the future. The NEAR future would be nice… :slight_smile:

So, how are you today?

#2

I am lucky in that I did not marry a narcissist. I had dated WAY TOO
MANY and I chose a man 13 years ago, who was actually a nice guy.
My mother was dying when my husband and I were living together (3rd
year of going out). She was terrified of my being alone (maybe to
take care of my N father?). She insisted that we get engaged. We did.
I put together a beautiful wedding in my parents backyard in three
weeks. One week before my mother died, we got married. She was in a
wheel chair with an oxygen tank. I don’t know if she knew what was
going on, but she was there. She died almost to the minute one week
later. I have written about it in publications.

My husband values me. He might not say it out loud, but I think
because of my mother’s horrible death and his mother’s death last
year (they both died of lung cancer), he knows what women provide:
Balance, beauty, honesty, loyalty, and love. When you don’t have
those things you can go crazy. I think my father has struggled. I
know he has. I don’t think he allows my step mother to give him those
things. Just his meals and clean up service. I know my brother has
struggled. I know he has . He married late because he claimed his was
incapable of loving. And perhaps because they don’t have balance in
their hearts, they don’t have balance in their minds, and thus they
see me as a walking ghost of my mother who does not deserve real
love. My words mean nothing, so they are aloud to get away with a
less balanced life. But now that they have truly betrayed me, I have
a hard time mending the broken fence. I have to mend myself and
never bet on their recovery. Because I think after SO MANY years
(prior to mom’s death), neither one of them knew THE REAL IMPORTANCE
OF ME. And now it is far too late. I can’t keep on showing up to
be knocked down. I VALUE MYSELF WAY TOO MUCH.

On Sep 19, 2007, at 8:15 AM, angiezee wrote:

#3

Ah yes, Fall is in the air. This is my favorite time of year too, Thanksgiving, Christmas and PUMPKIN PIE!! Yummy! My Birthday is October 4th and it represents the beginning of a new year. What do I want this year? What’s important to me? In past years I’ve had lofty goals and I would push to accomplish them. Even though this year was emotionally difficult I managed to make headway in all my personal goals. This is my strength and my weakness. I drive myself to the point where I don’t have fun, I stay focused on the goal. After the emotional turmoil of this year my primary objective is to RELAX and reconnect with my creator. Feed myself spiritually, LET GO AND LET GOD. Unpack my emotional baggage and give it to God so that I may be healed.

Live, breathe, be happy, smell the roses, have some fun, rest and be easy. God is my strength and my redeemer. The darkness has left, the N is gone and the light has come to take his place.

MAY THE NEW YEAR BRING YOU PEACE

#4

So sorry, I just had another anxiety attack. I am getting there. I
know that I am…Betrayal is SO STRONG
though. The Fall is beautiful DoubleDee

Alright, I am having another moment while sweeping. I just need to
vent… My family lied to me for seven months (during my mother in
law’s death which they never acknowledged) about something I should
have known about and been a part of. (selling of the family
heirloom). They reversed it on me to make me take the blame by
calling me selfish. And then never really apologized and said my
brother had the greatest taste and the cutest grandchild. And then
lied to me again about its value. And now I feel like I have
betrayed and ruined the family because I disagreed with them.
Although my brother was the one who betrayed the family trust. And I
am booted out, and they think I am “crazy”. It just enough to make
ANYONE"S HEAD SPIN OFF…But I am still here, alive and
kicking…

On Sep 19, 2007, at 9:58 AM, DoubleDee wrote:

#5

What a great topic…its always good to think about our good points and not constantly where we feel we fail.

Autumn or fall as you guys call it ! Is my favorite season , its just so beautiful and feels good. My garden looks even prettier now than it did in full summer.

OK so let me say something good about me and my life…I have a good husband who has many annoying faults but doesnt have a selfish bone in his body and would always put his family first. I have 5 amazing kids who Im so proud of for being such individulals. I have the cutest baby grandaughter in the world, she is an absolute joy. I have the best friends I could ask for and a lovely sister. Sadly my mum is ill but atm not too bad ! Each day is a blessing.

I have an extended family of my childrens friends…we have a 3 bedroomed house but its usually overflowing with people, many who virtually live here at times, I love the fact I have a home where people WANT to be/live. I must be doing something right.

Other than my ‘obsession’ (my N)…Im one of the best friends a person could want. Im always ready to help in any way and am loving and kind and honest and genuine and never afraid to admit to my faults and my weaknesses.

OK thats more than enough lol