Chronic Back Pain

Chronic Pain
#1

To all of my friends at Careplace, thank you so much for all your prayers and thoughts…i was in the hospital last Thursday May 3rd - Sunday May 6th because they couldn’t get the back pain under control. I fractured my tailbone and twisted left sacroiliac joint in my pelvis 10 years ago while giving birth to my 9 lb and 9 oz son. Since then i have also developed bulging discs in the L4, L5 and S1 area as well as 2 with tears (not significant for the doctors to operate) i also have degenerative disc disease and facet disease and stenosis and arthritis of the spine and si joint left side. I have sciatica down the left leg everyday. I have weakness in the leg and sometimes loss of bowel but still no surgery options they say. They offered to remove the tailbone area but with no guarantees and that is probably not the main source of the pain to begin with. I also suffer from fibromyalgia and sleep apnea. Migraines, carpal tunnel syndrome and post traumatic stress disorder from abusive marriage, seasonal affective disorder from living in Michigan (winter blues) wouldn’t be so bad if i could get out and cross country ski or go four wheeling again but too ill for that now. Can’t even go sledding with my kids anymore. And then i have Depression because of the chronic pain i am in and may have slight bipolar depression as well. Have ulcers hiatel hernia, and other things that are ailments but the least of my problems.

After the four day hospital stay and pain block injections and mylegram in spine, i was sent home only to return on thursday may 10th to the ER and they gave me a couple of double shots of dilouded to get me by and followed up with a family doctor on friday. Since this is a chronic condiition i’ve been dealing with for 10 years they aren’t in any big yank to get me relief. It was explained to me finally on Friday that i’m going to have to face the fact that i am in chronic back pain and will be for the rest of my life unless a miracle happens because there is no surgery options at this time and even if there would be no promises or guarantees that it would relieve this 24/7 pain that on a scale of 1 - 10 is and has been at a 10+. I have a small pharmacy i take now including 2 antidepressants, 2 muscle relaxers, 1 for anxiety, 2 for pain and 1 for stomach for the damage all the meds. cause lol. Some i take in daytime as not to make me drowsy and the others at night for a good nights sleep. I have to remember to wear CPAP machine though or i could die because the medication sedates me so much. I now have to walk with a cane to help get the pressure off the si joint and i will be getting a handicap parking permit. I look normal though so i don’t want to get looks from others for that. And i will only use it on really bad days. I always feel others hurt worse than i do so let them have the closer spot and i need the exercise. The doctor Friday put it bluntly that she refuses to give me anything stronger for the pain than i already have because our bodies get too immune to it and need more and more and eventually we could end up out on the street searching for drugs and all of her pain patients are now dead because they could never get enough pain control. That scares me though because i have never abused my pain meds. and if i don’t hurt so bad i don’t take them until i can’t stand the pain. I am going back to physical therapy and it will hurt worse before it feels better it always does from the past i know. I am going to start back to swimming. I’m going to biofeeback therapy. Keeping with my psycologist or the new psychiatrist. Mainly the best treatment for me is that when i hurt i lay down and don’t get disturbed but that is hard when you have a 16 year old and a 10 year old that always needs Mom. The husband isn’t much help and the marriage is on the rocks but for the kids sakes we are trying to get along. I know it isn’t easy for any of them to live with me and watch me suffer and feel like they can’t help me but they can help me by not fighting with each other and by picking up after themselves. A week before going into the hospital i got drunk thinking that would be the medication of choice to get rid of my pain. It only made matters worse i got sick and threw up all night long and hurt worse and couldn’t take any thing for pain then because i had to wait for the alcohol to get out of my system. I am also going to go to a rehab doctor that does a decompression table and see how that works. And there is a doctor in Michigan that specializes with the sacroiliac joints (in the pelvis) because in my heart i still believe that is where the pain is coming from. When the large baby fit through the pelvis i think it got misplaced and has stayed that way but what do i know i just live in the body the doctors don’t want to hear me out. I felt my low back go out when they were lifting me off the table and pulling with forceps and vaccum to get my son out and my friends said i turned grey well yeah because i was in pain. I just wish the doctors could all agree and not put each other down and that they could try and help all of us who are suffering and at least make us not feel like we are crazy because we know what happiness feels like and we know what joy feels like and hunger and believe me we know what PAIN feels like. God Bless all you Mother’s today on Mother’s Day and enjoy your day. Love to all of you and thanks again the prayers are really starting to show up in different areas of my life. Including the help i’ve been getting in getting my house cleaned and unpacked. So thanks again and my prayers go out to each and everyone of you. Love Sherry aka Gimpybear40

#2

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#3

hi, thats horrible , everything you been, are going through.im not sure what your taking for pain now, but it sounds like you should ask your dr for a referral to a pain clinic.if you go to a pain clinic, thats what they do is treat ongoing chronic pain. they will put you on something you can take everyday to live a better quality life, than you are now.i have some of the problems you do, and it is getting harder day by day to deal with them.i have a very hyperactive 2 year old who needs his mommy to play with him, its hard.i have a variety of meds as well. the muscle relaxers make me way too tired to take thru the day, so i take at night to help me sleep.they have me on ritalin thru the day.they said alot or people are on it to stay motivated, and have more energy and not be as tired.i had some trouble with drs not wanting to help me manage my pain, so i asked to be referred to a pain clinic.they give me 4 pain meds a day to take, its worth going to.if i didnt have pain meds i wouldnt be able to even get out of bed, and how can you stay in bed all day with a 2 yr old?i feel for you everything your going thru, but hang in there, and i urge you to check into the clinic thing, you been suffering for way too long, as gloomy as it seems, there are things drs can do, most of them would rather you suffer than give you “addicting medicine” that they know, for some is the only solution.if you have to, find another dr.someone a little more compasionate that wants to help you live a better life, take care.

#4

I wish you did not have to experience so much discomfort.  You were in my thoughts today at church.  I used to wonder why Jesus said that if a person has faith the size of a mustard seed, one could command a mountain and to move, and it would obey.  Two things have come to me that have helped me understand that statement.  The first relates to energy and quantum physics.  I don't think I could express the details, but it has been discovered (sometimes the hard way), that a gentle nudge to an electron under the right circumstances can initiate huge reactions.  The combustion that takes place inside an auto engine generates enough power to move a few thousand pounds of metal at dangerous speeds. Yet each molecule of fuel generates only a tiny amount of energy.  All those molecules have to work together to release any significant amount of energy.  But remember, it only takes one little electron, when disturbed, to initiate this huge energy release.

 

Thought energy may be difficult to measure, and because we don't see it or feel it, we assume that this is a very small amount of energy.  In at least one lab, monkeys have had a electrodes attached to their heads.  These electrodes are connected to electronic controllers that interpret the input from the monkey's brain waves, and based on that input, manipulate robotic arms.  Using this device, monkeys have learned to telepathically control those arms in order to retrieve pieces of fruit located outside the cage.  The only reason I bring this up is to remove any doubt that our thoughts have power.  That is of course if we have at least the cognitive resources of a monkey.  I am convinced that we have a surplus of power, or perhaps I should say "faith power" to accomplish whatever we want.

 

This brings me to the second concept that facilitates my understanding of faith.  The mustard seed teaching has another meaning as well.  Consider the relative size of a mustard seed and the huge tree that is an extension of the life contained within the seed.  Consider also that life emerged from the mustard seed, and it grew slowly, with each season extending itself a little bit further until finally it became huge, and its presence has an affect on everything that is near to it.  I believe human faith requires the same growth process.  It is not likely that an individual will decide to have faith that a strongly desired object will materialize before his or her eyes, and then see it actually happen.  A long time ago, spectacular miracles were more common than they are today.  That's because our so-called "knowledge," generally the stuff society or school teaches us, contradicts faith principles.  For some reason, becoming familiar with science and technology has degraded our faith in what is possible.

 

For that reason, if we want to mobilize faith, for reaching a goal, attaining financial well-being or healing, it is best to start out with "baby steps" of faith.  For example, it may not be possible to believe or have faith in the absolute cessation of pain.  It is simply too much of a stretch for our imagination that has been constrained by "knowledge."  Faith is still available to us, but now we must practice, practice, practice.  Just as a baby needs to crawl before she or he can walk and eventually run, we need to take time to let our faith evolve.

 

In your situation, I would suggest that you pray, talk to Spirit, or do what you normally do to activate faith.  And then, consider the possibility that tomorrow, you can be in a little bit less pain than you experienced today, then ask for and thank Spirit or the Universe for giving you that measure of pain relief.  I believe that over time, these tiny reductions in pain, along with positive change in your emotional response related to pain will add up to significant success, just as the tiny molecular reactions inside an engine generates a surprising amount of power.  Consider also that many of us are sending prayers your way, therefore, the "small" quantities of prayer energy are combining, and will release power to assist you in healing.

 

Reading this may not impress you at all, or convince you of anything, but my prayer is that it will help you find focus on your own "mustard seed," which by now may already be a good sized tree.

 

Consider yourself hugged, Aaron

#6

Hi There, I am Dee, I also suffer from chronic back pain, neuropathy oof my right leg and more. I have just found out I have another herniated disc in my neck and a cyst over my sciatic nerve where I had a fusion done. I have had 11 back surgies from a car accident, where L-5/S-1 herniated. After the first discectomy it continued to herniate until there was not disc left. Once it was fusioned, then L-4 herniated, discectomy’s, then fusion, then the pins came loose, then on and on. I also suffer from depression PTSD from being a paramedic for 25 years. My point is I do understand the chronic back pain. I have been from pain doctor to pain doctor but have found a really great one now. When I went to him I was on Oxycontin 40 mg, every 12 hrs., and oxycodone for breakthrough pain. I had become opoid tolerant, so now I am on a extended relief Dilaudid 40 mg, every 12 hours.I try to research pain management as much as possible, and my pain doc seems to be doing the “in” thing. First he manages any depression and/or stress (what do we as chronic pain patients have to be stressed about?) then he uses antidepressants to change the way the neurotransmitters in your brain respond to pain, then he addresses sleep issues, then exercise, well I am permently disabled due to my injury and have a permanet lifting ability of 25 pounds and my pain keeps me from standing, walking and sitting for over 20 miniutes or so. So in my case he tries supplements like glucosimine, he tries anuway finally he addresses pain meds. He doesn’t switch every month and recently when I was hospitalized for abdominal pain he came in to manage my pain. The problem there was the nurses, whom wanted to give me oxycodone for pain first ( yeah like a asprin for a migraine) by the time they got to the dilaudid I was starting to withdraw. Labels I hate them and hope as time progresses we will not have the label of “wants pain meds”, as we already have them at home, right? ANyway I tell you my story to let you know I think I can understand your situation and will keep you in my prayers for some relief someway somehow. I think we need to stick together as I know my family support system doesn’t exsist, but at least there is online. Good Luck To You! dee