Blitzen, are you an author as well?
On Oct 22, 2007, at 12:05 PM, blitzen wrote:
H*LL NO BUP!!
But I do have a coupla items for sale on ebay if anyone is interested?
chuckles
I can write “good enough” but in a literary world of REALLY talented people “good enough” doesn’t earn ANYBODY the title “author”.
GD
MAYBE YOU DID NOT NOTICE, YOU JOINED THE
" NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY "DISORDER" GROUP "
You threw me off, so I had to check to make sure, that is the name of this group. Do a search, I am sure you can find,
THE ROTTEN, DESPICABLE, OR EVEN EVIL, GROUP SOMEWHERE ON LINE . If that is what you prefer. Hugs mamolie
Mamolie,
I think pointing out that what you are discussing is not actually Narcissistic Personality Disorder, as defined by the medical profession, but rather rotten, despicable, and even evil, abuse, a quite different topic, is entirely relevant here.
I really sympathise with your troubles, but labelling them inappropriately with a personality disorder that has been distorted out of all recognition by cynical amateurs online does not help anyone.
Don’t you realise that anybody actually formally diagnosed as having NPD is diagnosed as the disorder is recognised by the medical profession, and may very well not have any of the abusive attributes you misguidedly identify NPD with?
“NPD” is not a trendy new world for “bstrd” you know, it is an actual disorder where the individual fails (for whatever reason) to have a normal range of altruistic regard, instead turning that regard inwards, to himself, along with the healthy amount of narcissistic self regard that we all have.
If that person has an otherwise abusive disposition there will be little or nothing to restrain it, and they may behave appalingly, but if not, the person with NPD is very likely to just be self involved and self absorbed.
The “inhuman, invincibly diabolic and infernally manipulative” qualities that Sam Vaknin and his followers attribute to the sufferers of NPD are just a very harmful kind of inverted boasting.
GD
You know, there’s some wisdom in that for me.
It fits in somewhere along the continuum of how I could have taken better care of myself, how I could have protected my own sense of sanity in my miserable love relationship. It has something to do with an ever growing awareness I’m getting this week, TODAY - of how some things are JUST NOT ACCEPTABLE.
For the last 6 months I’ve been thinking of my ex as disordered because it helped me understand and accept what was so damn confusing and crazy-making. I’m not dismissing he may be disordered. He likely is, although I suspect its ASP, but then I suspect what SV describes in his book is actually ASP.
But in the end it doesnt matter. Oh, having my confused insanity made understandable mattered, yes it did. But what of it now? What of it while it was happening? What of the crime he committed against me he thought he got away with, and that I will never have the ability to convict him for?
All it boils down to is, it was despicable behaviour. IT WAS JUST NOT ACCEPTABLE. There isnt a man alive who can convince me that it was.
-period-
And who knows, God wants everyone to be happy so there just may be a miracle that one day he’ll get a hard knock in his frontal lobe, or his life comes crashing down around him, or his hormone levels change and somehow, in some miraculous way his thinking and behaviour in this world will drastically change and he can live a normal, fulfilling, relational life.
That would be so nice, for him, for his future children (please God, for them let the miracle happen), for everyone else in his life…for the world.
But I know this with unwavering certainty…that miracle will never happen with me, in my presence, through my love, or sacrifice or support or commitment to him.
It just wont.
Because how he is with me, how he sees me, the choices he makes that impacted my life…were not, are not, can not be acceptable.
Evil or disordered, who gives a fuck?
This is the only life I, or you get, and the 80 years, 60 years, the next 10 years is TOO SHORT and too precious to let anyone, no matter how much we would have wanted to help them, DIMINISH OUR QUALITY OF LIFE and the lives of our children.
We’re here to love and be loved…not love and be made into the living dead.
Cry less… smile more…have fun…choose not to be in pain anymore.
Mamolie,
I also encourage you to stick around. You are an invaluable contributor to
this group.
Take care.
Sam
----- Original Message -----
From: “thephoenix101” npd-cpt6420@lists.careplace.com
To: palma@unet.com.mk
Sent: Monday, October 22, 2007 5:09 PM
Subject: Re: [npd] Coping effectively with Sam Vaknin
Nah. She is someone who has been stalking me (and numerous other mental
health authors and forum moderators) for years (after I have spurned her
advances and offers to become her … lover!!!). She is quite insane but
rather harmless. Ignore her. She is a very sick individual.
Her real name is “Gaye Dalton” and she claims to live in Ireland. Google her
name to find out more. She uses numerous aliases, among them Cricket
Courage.
Sam
----- Original Message -----
From: “bup” npd-cpt6420@lists.careplace.com
To: palma@unet.com.mk
Sent: Monday, October 22, 2007 6:29 PM
Subject: Re: [npd] Coping effectively with Sam Vaknin
You said it Phoenix:
“It’s just not acceptable”
And
“Evil or disordered, who gives a feck?”
That sums it all up for me…
It’s not about WHY someone hurts you…it’s just about why you need to make the hurting stop, and how you are going to do that…
…and then how you are going to do your best to avoid it EVER happening to you again.
If someone is diagnosed with NPD (and it is just a diagnosis, and not even that, it is, officially, a CATEGORY of dysfunction), as long as they are not hurting anyone, that is THEIR business, and it isn’t for us to decide who they are, or whether they can heal, let alone to revile them for things they would probably never do and might well be just as appalled by as anyone else.
Even if they ARE hurting someone, it is not for us to decide ANYTHING except that they should stop.
GD
Compliments. FINALLY, someone with a head on his shoulders.
My role is to serve as an ideal narcissist to allow you, the victims, to
project onto me your hate and revulsion and anger and grieving.
This is called TRANSFERENCE in psychoanalysis.
I am like a BLANK screen onto which you can TRANSFER your hurt. I am an
ACCESSIBLE substitute for YOUR narcissist who is UNTOUCHABLE and REMOTE.
I am here for you to interact with me as you would have with your
narcissist, if you only could. I am here to provide you with
closure-by-proxy.
Sam
PS:
The bibliography of my book contains 2000 items. NONE of what I have written
is ORIGINAL. It is all based on extant research and scholarly literature.
Download the bibliography (and many other goodies) here:
http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/NPDBibliography.zip
----- Original Message -----
From: “bup” npd-cpt6420@lists.careplace.com
To: palma@unet.com.mk
Sent: Monday, October 22, 2007 5:49 PM
Subject: Re: [npd] Coping effectively with Sam Vaknin
Hello Englechen…
Shall I point them to the link to posts where you tried to persuade me to make a documentary in London with you early last year?
Or the ones where you tried to bully me into it…or both?
But enough of this irrelevancy…
What on EARTH has any of that to do with what an abusive, self serving, little wnker you have been on these boards, what an hypocritical and offensive, attention seeking little gt you have been with “Jesus Christ, Narcissist” let alone what a ruthlessly exploitative little conman you have been, well pretty much all your life…but SPECIFICALLY since October 1998 on the internet?
GD
Sam,
Your “role” is to serve as WHAT???
On which planet.
Get over yourself.
You first tried THAT line on Listbot in 1999 when people got tired of you whinging for sympathy because you weren’t having any fun being a nasty little beast to people (the origins of the switch from the invalid Sam Vaknin approach to “pity the poor N” to the even less valid “burn the bad N at the stake”, and it was no more convincing then than it is now.
As for the “references” in your work…so far, every one I finally tried to check out, to rebuild the Wikipedia article, without your avid self promotion, DIDN’T match the assertion sourced to it, so that the Wikipedia article had to be rebuild without any of your nonsense as well.
So you can cut that cr*p too.
GD
Does anyone know why I might be having difficulty posting a new topic?
OK, that was just a test. I have typed 2 new topics and both were lost in cyber space before they posted. VERY irritating. Anyway, does anyone know who to contact in a case like that?
Lucia,
There seems to be a glitch in the script that means SOME things only “take” the second time you post them.
As someone who writes scripts myself, I can tell you that you can never fully debug a script until you have it “out there” being given day to day use.
I am sure it will be fixed soon.
GD
OMG Sam, you call that a bibliography reflecting references?
That is a joke, would you explain exactly where you got your education and in what?
Personally I prefer to give them sarcastic attention.
A guy in our extended circle of friends (92% chance of NPD in my opinion) loves to tell people about how he solved problems with his huge intelligence.
I get all Marilyn Monroe on him and go, “Oh [Dave], your sperm must be so expensive!”
mamolie npd-cpt6420@lists.careplace.com wrote: