First of all, I REMOVED MYSELF from the bladder cafe because of the flaming messages attacking me for congratulating a member on his successful surgery, and because people attacked me for daring to ask for their support to deal with the cystoscopy exam.
I thought about quitting this group because of your hate messages and the fact that Mr. Crilly seems to enjoy “hounding” and attacking me, but I still need some support in my battle with bladder cancer, even if Mr. Crilly is able to do things on his own. If you sincerly believed anything you said in your emails about really being a cancer support group then you would try to support me in my ordeal and not attack me. I have not made any false statements in any of my messages and, unlike you, I have never used profanity and I have never wished anyone ill.
I really wish you would cease these attacks. I am having enough problems dealing with bladder cancer. If your goal is to be the largest bladder cancer group on the web, I wish you well. I only ask you to think of the people who are trying to cope with this disease and have some compassion for them. Please try to understand that this bladder cancer is a terrible affliction and I am trying to get myself ready for a major surgery that can change my life, and not an RC. I have never heard a doctor use the term “RC” for the bladder removal surgery, and I asked an in-person bladder cancer group what RC meant to them and a couple said Roman Cathlic and several said Royal Crown Cola.
I have had the courage to get through all of the insertions for exam, surgery and BCG (47 insertions in my urethra), and I am working on getting the courage to go through with the surgery. I have heard so many horror stories about men who have undergone this surgery and that why I wanted so much to have Mr. Stump tell me more of his successful surgery. But he never did respond because of the flood of hate messages you allowed on your site. Why did you allow those messages and why did you delete my very short message asking for help?
I care about people and several people have told me that my humor and positive attitude have helped them get through some difficult times, but Mr. Crilly, in an email to me, called this “hogwash”. I have wept when members of my support groups have died as a result of this cancer; I have send donations to cancer groups as memorials to my lost friends; I am a regular contributor to St. Jude’s Hospital for children.
I thought when I quit the bladder cafe that I was walking away from a group who has no heart or caring but your group seems to keep following me. Why am I so important to you? You have your 400 plus members and your design award - why do you have to keep attacking me?