need some help with this situation and his consatant need for divorce or more affection
can you give more info
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I don’t know when he is depressed,or when it begins.
All I know he begins with cruel remarks that are way out if the way for his norm.He always picks up on a flirtation from me.Then he will decide to ignor it.
I was thinking today that he told me I was not affectionate to him for 3 months.It isn’t true.He didn’t return to me the usual flirt back.He has found out in novemeb he is becomign a grandfather.The babies are here,triplets!I think when things happen for others during live events and diferent roles he can’t be happy about it like others are.He shows the signs he knows others have when in fact it is really about him.He is old.In his mind this is a horible thing.I have heard his comment on being old.He calls himself old when he is in anger at his son.He thought his own son didn’t want the kids at his highschool to see him becaus ehe was old.These are my husbands words to his own son.This was not the case.His brother told me once his 50th birthday was like hell for him.He is 56 now this april and he is a grandfather.He isn’t close to his oldest son who are the proud parents.He used to beat his son so badly the guy has a really hard time being with him at all.I doubt the babies come here at all.I think his son will attempt to open a door.It will depend on his dad.He can say the strangest things.This is probably why the time with his dad becomes too tense at times.
I know this man I have married is overly sensitive.I can’t change the fact he is a grandfather and what he is thinking unless he shares that with me.He does the show and deep down he thinks of himself.From that stand point he is selfish,he knows it and he hides it and bursts things out of it’s prospective and makes issues where there really aren’t issues.
He told me I was not affectionate enough and I had to go get councling to learn how to love him.It will not matter.He lies to the theropist the whole time.He turns me into himself.I suddenly and listening to him telling her I have these moods and it is so predictable it’s like he can tell when its like a schedule.I coun;dn’t believe he was doing this.I went back and I told her what he did.I called another doctor in the group because she could’nt talk about his case.I ask him how long he has been using this doctor goin gby the remark she made she’s known him for a long time.My husband said he just met her whe I did.
Does this sound like bipolar?I was given another ocotr there and it was a guy.I told him the case and he called me.I wrote all the stuf down about what was goin gon in my house.He told me to get out.I was not safe here.
My husband knows he has something wrong he told me that aftr we married.He then in the same breath told me something was wrong with me too.I was couldn’t bleieve he said that.
Sounds like he can’t accept truth.To him if it looks ugly he has powers to change the ugly to somewhere else so he will not have to see it there in him.I believe he belives his mind can change and make wrongs right.He thinks too he can make his own laws.
He has used cocaine.I heard from the family they believed him to deal drugs.He created an insurance scam to get money when he was young and it went sour.He cheated on wife one.Cheatd on wife two.Don’t know about wife three but I think he cheatd with wife 2 on wife 3.He actually met wife 2 and had family portraits done with their son at age 7 or 8.They divorced with him at age 2.
I would be very upset if I heard these things coming out of this marriage.
He loves me he says.But,there are these game she plays.He lies and twists the lie to something else and that will not ven make since.If he didn’t have porn he woould have to cheat on me.Then he changed it to saying would I rather have him using porn or cheat on him.Well now mind you what woman would like either of the choices there?That makes no sense.He is lieing anyway and no none of the above.What the hell is this anyway,truth or dare?He is not normal that is all I can say.He has beaten me up and I had to call 911.He hurt me so that I needed to see my doctor the next day.He went off on his vacation to the beach with his young son from the 2nd marriage and their best friend Bill and son.I had to call him to report that my doctor called it in abuse and battery and he needed to comment to a theropist.So this is whre the theropist came in.Oh my lovely husband says he knows for sure he will no tbe able to control him tmper.It might happen agin.I told him this.It better not.He better promise me it will not happen agin.He said it could very well.
Oh the talk he neded too last sunday night,he made sure I understood he didn’t want a divorce he only wants to say how he feels about me not loving him and showing enough affection to him.Now I know about abusers.They put doubt there first before they ever get started.If that was so the case the word divorce woul dhave not ben used,period.
I am tird of living in a nut house.I am making other plans.Thanks and hope to talk soon.