to tell you all this, but if I cannot be honest and vulnerable here, where else can I go? My ex-boyfriend and I spoke yesterday. We work together and had to go to a meeting and of course, it is impossible for us to stay apart when we are in the same room. My knees go weak when he comes close and there is a sexual reaction that, quite frankly, is overwhelming. He knows it, too.
So, he starts pushing to get together tomorrow night. The last conversation we had last weekend was to say good-bye because I expressed my need for more and he basically told me that he was not in a place to give me more. We agreed to part and he even said that he may consult with a therapist to help him sort through this.
Yesterday i didn’t say i would go on Friday. Instead i told him that i’d talk to him later. Well, of course he has called 3 x since then, wearing me down asking me to go out with him. I reluctantly agreed and i am hoping that we will be able to talk this through and come to a common understanding about what we are doing in this relationship. I think that I am stupid to try again, but i feel too weak to say no at this point. Today was a sad day, attending the funeral of my former Mother-in-law and I guess i was so vulnerable that when he called I couldn’t resist any more.