anyone dealing with marriage, and insurance. I am about start, just needed a little advice.

I think that every situation is different but I will let you know what I went through. My husband and I got married in 2002 and I had medicaid at the time (I live in NY). When we got married and he was able to carry me on his insurance, my medicaid was stopped (by NY state) because I was married and because of his income. He was making more than the poverty level for a two person family. They didn’t care about what bills we had and what my medical bills would rack up to, they just saw that he could carry insurance on me and they no longer wanted to pay. Now that we have our son and I am on disability, I still don’t qualify for insurance through the state. NY is really strict. My medical bills in the past year have gone well over $1,000,000 with the roughly three months of hospitalizations, three embolizations on my old left lung, the double lung and liver transplants, and the recent Ileostomy. The insurance has paid for a lot of it but the copays for the hospitalizations, medical flights, doctor visits, and medications have added up to well over $6,000 that we have had to pay out of pocket. I would say that you have to look at this through every angle…income level, family size, etc. I will tell you that honestly although my husband and I love each other with all our hearts and we love the family that we have made, we kinda wish we never got married because the state would help me with my medical bills more. But seriously, don’t let that stop you from getting married. There are other resources out there. We have had help from a lot of friends and family and we also had fundraisers to help raise money for the transplants. Marriage is a wonderful thing you just have to try to find ways to manipulate the system (legally that is). I don’t know if this will help but I hope it gives you some advice.

One of our friends ,who would lose their husbands pension and insurance if they married, talked to our pastor and they were married in the church, but not by the state, so as far as they were concerned they are married it is just not recognized by the state…and they didn’t lose their insurance or pension that way…