Not sure what to do

I am in love with and live with a man recently diagnosed with Bipolar. He is not properly medicated or seeing a psychiatrist yet, waiting for financial assistance to be prescribed and afford his medication. He was on an antidepressant and mood stablizer for a couple weeks (and honestly, during that time, I began to see positive changes). Now he is on an antidepressant only, prescribed by his medical doctor. which, from what I have read, is not a good route to go. I have read that it can trigger mania or hypomania. He was in a severely depressed state recently, although has had long bouts of mania/hypomania in the past. I have recently begun to see symtoms of what I believe may be the onset of hypomania/mania, although they are suttle. This is all very new to me and I want to make sure I handle it correctly. I contacted a support group but it doesn’t meet until next month and I’m very concerned now. I let him know my concerns about being only on the antidepressant, but received a very negative response. I want to tell him that I’m seeing signs (not sleeping, jumpier personality, changes in sex patterns), but I am afraid of setting him off at this point. I mentioned it briefly, but he denied it, now, a few days later, the symptoms seem somewhat stronger. He has been very irrational in the past. On the other hand, I think, as his partner, I have a responsibility to tell him what I am noticing, even if he is disagreeable. I just wonder if waiting it out for a month (until he can receive proper medical care) is advisable. How much control can a Bipolar person really have, without proper medication, just by knowing the symptoms are beginning to surface? Thanks so much to anyone who took the time to read this.

Hi Margaret Ann,

I’m not really sure what one would do in this situation. I realized that I was bipolar when my doctor gave me a survey to fill out. Once he saw the results and asked me a few questions, it all started making more sense. Even though I knew this to be true, it took me a long time to accept that I was ill. Since he is being so stubborn at the moment, perhaps the best thing that you can do is go to see a therapist or counselor to discuss how stressed out and worried you are. I wish I had more ideas, but it sounds like he will have to go in his own time. I wish you the best luck!

Date: Wed, 22 Aug 2007 14:03:57 -0400> To: katypeterson@hotmail.com> From: bipolar-cpt5687@lists.careplace.com> Subject: [bipolar] Not sure what to do> >

Living with someone that is bipolar (as I am bipolar ) is almost the same as living with a alcoholic that refuses to quit drinking; ( esp. if he refuses to get help for himself, but his doesn’t sound like the case if he has an appointment next month)and my opinion, leave it alone! By you telling him what you are seeing, is only going to put a strain on your relationship, and make him more manic. If he is actually going to go to the doctor in a month, let the doctor tell him what he has to tell him; however, you can call the doctor on your own and just relate what you are seeing, and allow the doctor to take care of the situation. I am on my meds and am doing the best that I can; and at this point in time so is your partner. give him the “benefit of the doubt” and allow the professionals to take care of him. I know when my husband tries to tell me what to do with my bipolar, it only makes me worse; and i don’t need someone to tell me i am having problems with mania or even the depression; believe me i know when i am. and i’m sure your partner also knows. It sounds like cymbals going off in my head when my husband tries to tell me what to do, since he is not bipolar, and has no idea what is going on in my head. however it is different with a man, i read the depression is worse for them because of the stigma of the man is suppose to be strong! but if he has a good doc he will know what to do. but like i said, this is only my personal opinion.