SSD - Too scared to try and go back to work

Anyone out there working on getting disability benefits?  I was turned down on my first try which I know is standard practice.  I appealed last month and have been told that it will take 3-5 months for their decision, but not to get my hopes up.  I understand it’s usually the 3rd or 4th appeal that it goes through and to just hang in there.  I’m fully prepared for the wait but sometimes I contemplate going back to work.  But then I actually think about what that means to me and I darn near go into a total panic.  WAY, WAY, WAY, WAY TOO much stress for me to try and work around.  I can somewhat control it in my daily life when it’s me, my husband, and son, but to be working in an office…  I think I’d be in the hospital pretty soon after trying to take this on, and really don’t want to go through the crying jags, the panic attacks and such.  What are the feelings on this out there?  Just wondering.

Kihm, Did you have to see their doctors? I had to go to one. They asked really stupid questions like, name three major cities, ect. They acted like I was retarted or something. Couldn’t quite figure it out. Should I act out of it or what? What are they looking for? I don’t really want to go through that again. It was demeaning. Thanks for the message. I feel a little better about being home.

It’s difficult, I’m on disabilty after working hard for years on my professional career…it sucks…but this is my life and I do the best that I can!


Did you get your disability yet? I see this is an old message… just wondering how it went. I hope it went well for you.

As Kihm wrote, it's extremely important to file appeals immediately. You have 60 days to file, but if you wait that long you've wasted 59 days. all it takes is a 2 page form on the SSA web site. filing immediately is especially true for the second appeal, the hearing. in some states your hearing could be more than a year after you file the appeal. my hearing was 10 months after i filed the appeal.

i started getting ssdi in december 2010. i was initially turned down and my first appeal was denied also. I finally got it with my third appeal, the hearing before an administrative judge.

i'm single and don't have any family who would/could help me out, so getting ssdi was really important. originally i felt horrible about being a "welfare bum" but like Kihm, i realized i deserved it: i'd earned it. but it still bothers me sometimes and then my therapist has to set me straight!

Some words of advice. (1) NEVER never start from the beginning again after you've been turned down. you're wasting precious time. And if you refile with the same information you're going to get the same answer.

(2) Get a lawyer for the hearing. here in california SSDI lawyers don't get paid if you don't get some sort of lump-sum retroactive pay. i think it's the same everywhere but i'm not sure. be sure to check it out. Be sure you sign a contract that spells out exactly what you are responsible for paying, win or lose.

(3) just like with regular Social Security for retirees, you need to have worked and contributed to social security for a certain amount oftime to be eligible for benefits. How much you get is determined by how much you've contributed to SSA. Someone who's worked 20 years will get more than someone who's worked 10. but anything is better than nothing!

there are some web sites out there with good info. my pc died last week and i lost all my explorer favorites so i've got to track them down . . . i'll come back afterward.

peace, c.

My mom more or less pressured me to go back to work after taking a year off. I think she kind of felt like I was burdening her. I took a part time job at a grocery store because it required little skill and is kind of robotic. I’d like to get a real job but I’m just so overwhelmed with the prospect of moving up in skill level and all of the changes that I’ve endured myself over the past two years. After starting my medication I gained 80 pounds. That and the devastation of being hospitalized for 3 months for a hypo-manic episode absolutely terrify me and I don’t know how I’m ever going to bounce back from that. I’m a completely different person than I was before the episode and I don’t know how I’m ever going to find a job that’s suitable for me because all of the skills that I had before, the creativity and the great ability to socialize and sell to people is gone. I’d go back to school but I don’t have any money, so I’m left without any skills to get out there and find a real job. What should I do?

i’m having a scary time trying to go back to work… i have an anxiety attack everytime i seriously try to apply for work. besides the stress, i have had TERRIBLE experiences. (i had to leave my last job because my coworker, who was also bp, was physically threatening me and the executive director was letting her. i walked out before i decked the bitch- both of them!) i feel like i’m too young to apply- not to mention i don’t know how i would actually live off of it. my friends are most likely running out of generosity, though.

so- three months into returning to work i had to go in for a physical… the doctor put me on a medical hold because i broke down in the exam room, and then two weeks later i ended up in the hospital. i file for the first time on friday- i could really use it as i am currently living in a homeless shelter and unable to return to work. everyone keep your fingers crossed.

I feel like everyone thinks I should be working. My ex, some family, and others.
I also have panic attacks, often after being manic and running out and getting a job, I have to quit several months later. It is soooo frustrating, I’m a very hard worker and have a good work ethic. I started working at 13, I couldn’t wait! There is nothing more humiliating to me than having to give an excuse for leaving, I don’t want to say “I’m bipolar” and hope they don’t label me. Plus it doesn’t look very good on the job history thingy… I haven’t worked in six years. I certainly hope I can get back to working though. I know the structure would be good. Anyway it’s very hard to explain it to someone who doesn’t experience it. That’s about it for me, I am starting to get on a rant! Plus I NEED coffee! Have a great day! :~)

I so feel you about the money-thing.  I HATE not having my own money but I keep telling myself that I contributed to taxes and SS for years, so the SSD I’m awarded is truly mine.  I always thought I’d grow old and retire one day, but now is the time that I need the help.  As far as my husband goes, it was hard at first because we were so accustomed to being a 2-income family.  I feel like I have contributed to the current situation by going over our finances and expenses with a fine tooth comb to get us on track of living just off his salary.  This also helps because when I am awarded my SSD, all that money can be put towards things we have disallowed ourselves for the last few years, medical costs, and of 'course towards savings.  So, don’t look at not having your own money a bad thing, but look at it as you’re still contributing to your family, but in a different manner that still effects the “household money.”  Through BP, I’ve really learned the lesson of what a true marriage should be about - communication and working together as a team.  No, everything is not all rosey here in the Harrington household, but I do contribute in ways that I didn’t have the opportunity to do so in the past due to working.  The other thing is keep appealing every single time you get turned down.  Don’t let it sit 1 day without appealing.  I’ve been told that there’s a different set of protocol used when you get to your 3rd appeal which increases your chances to 87%.  So, don’t give up!

Kihm, I’m also trying for disability. This is my second try. I never appealed. Now I’m starting over. I wonder about going back to work too. My self esteem is so low now and I’m afraid also. I get panic attacks too, just thinking about it. It is alot of stress to work. Being home is hard too. I’m used to having my own money and contributing. Now I feel guilty cause the burden is on my husband.