Thanks all of you for your support!

Pancreatitis
#1

Hi Friends,

THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT, PVT MESSAGES, HUGS, PRAYERS AND ENCOURAGING WORDS.

Today I feel little better. It’s been a while it’s going on like this - on and off pain almost every week. When it got worse by that time I was totally exhausted and couldn’t do anything.

Yes, I agree I give suggestions when someone is in pain but when I’m in pain it is hard to remember all the things to do and also just like you guys want support I need support too, don’t you think so? Just because I try to give information or tell anything from my experience it doesn’t mean that I’m beyond suffering and I have become a ‘Pain specialist’ and don’t need any support or some good encouraging words from the friends who care about me.

Nancy you asked me to come for Chat but by that time I had so much pain medication and definitely didn’t have strength to sit and chat with you and get suggestions to feel better. Thanks for the idea though. It’s the idea that counts. It would’ve been nicer instead of asking me to come to chat just say whatever you wanted to say in that mail. I’m not criticizing you, I’m just saying that when a person is going through so much pain, nausea, lot of stress, lot of pain, breakthrough pain medication - I don’t think people in those conditions won’t be able to sit down and chat.

Chats are ok when not many people are having serious pain problems and available, to get to know each other and to encourage each other too. It’s a wonderful idea. I’m glad you came up with it. Thanks for your offer to help but I’m sorry I couldn’t sit down and chat with you that night. It was a very hard night for the whole family.

I thank all the friends who understood my pain and suggested some things to try or just to take it easy and prayed for me to feel better.
Some people who were concerned were sending pvt messages and also my direct emails, Thanks for your concern guys. You guys are terrific. I’m feeling little better for now, hope it continues.

I’m sorry I didn’t had any strength to sit and send replies. I used to check messages sometimes whenever I used to get up to take medication and sometimes I couldn’t even see them for couple of days. My husband was busy in his work that’s why he couldn’t even reply to your messages.
Today because I’m feeling little better he went to Office to make up the hrs he missed and finish the piled up work. We are lucky that his office staff is very understanding and flexible. I have to thank him for being so patient even when I burst out with emotional stress.

I love you all and please remember I’m here to listen to you and let me know whenever you think I can do something for you all guys. I like to help but sorry couldn’t be on online too much because of my own health problems. I hope this time gives me a long break, (it’s not gone totally, feeling little better and hope it goes away) so that I can keep in touch.

I’ll send pvt messages to the friends slowly. Be patient with me guys.

You are all wonderful and I’m proud of this wonderful group. It has good support system and we should keep going on!

THANKS ONCE AGAIN TO EVERYONE.

Lots of love and hugs,
Durga.

#2

durga,

i am happy to learn you are feeling better. i am very srry that you have been going through such agony these past few weeks, please know that my intent for you to join me on messenger was only of good intent and i had no special ways to help ease your pains other then talk you through the pain as in being there. i do know that many suffer excruciating pains and many cannot bring themselves to chat nor answer the emails from compassionate ppl as here in careplace. i am new to this disease yet i am a veteran to other illness that has plagued me for many yrs with no hope in site. i use the comp to keep me informed and to keep me occupied. sometimes it just helps to keep my mind going and try to focus away from my illness and pain. tho i know this is not for everyone. so please except my apologies if you feel that my offering was not in line with what you needed, im not sure what anyone needs as far as illness/pain because everyone deals in a different way with their burdens.

i don’t have much to offer anyone in words only a kind one. i made the suggestion for joined chats due to the many that said they were not able to reach anyone to help them through a rough patch. with me giving out my messenger was for the ones that needed a kind word or company throughout the nite when they could not sleep due to pain or withdrawal. yes emails are great but they are not instant as in messenger. its difficult to offer advise to veterans of disease because they most likely have all the knowledge that is known to that particular illness, and they are left not knowing what to say or do other then to say im here if you need me. so i say durga i am here if you need me and i wish you the best.

nancy

#3

Hey Nancy,

I understand your good intentions of helping. I did say it’s the thought that counts my dear friend. I just said, some people won’t be in a position to sit and chat when the medicine makes drowsy and they just need to lie down. That’s what I meant. I did not misunderstand you in any way and I said sorry I couldn’t make it to the chat. Just like you said, you are there for me I’m here for you and everybody else. Thanks for trying to help me. Hope you are feeling better. What other health problems you have? I have friends who are suffering since childhood with lot of chronic problems and some have CP and some don’t have CP. They are leading miserable lives. WE became good friends and I try to help them in my way.

Remember you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Lots of love and hugs.
Durga

#4

Durga, you are such an angel, I too try to divert by doing a lot of the
things you said, sometimes it helps ! I thought I was the only one that
would feel good and do too much and poof back down with tons of pain,
sometimes I get so bad I think damn it must all be in my head, even
though I know its in my stomach !!! Warren if you read this, I knew
you were sick, I had that feeling and I will send you a private message
!

Lisa, hope you are well, or at least doing better, I need to read
emails as I have not for a day or 2 ! Love ya all
julie

#5

Durga, I am so glad to hear that you are ding a little better. I know it is not the quality of life that we would want and we will almost certainly never have the quality of life that a “normal, healthy” individual has and ends to take for granted, but it is an improvement.

This weekend was rough for me as well. It started out on Saturday with intense heartburn that nothing could control- neither Prevacid nor the Mylanta. Sunday I was feeling bad enough that I didn’t eat anything. Then I still had two huge vomitingfests. What really sucked was that since I hadn’t eaten anything, I only had liquids to vomit up. Then you get into the dry heaves that won’t stop, Luckily throughout these attacjks, my pain level stayed at “normal” levels- about a 3 or 4. I say “luckily” because I am out of my fast-acting pain meds. I see my primary (who also handles my pain management on Thursday and will be restocked then. Today I have the “fun” steatorrhea. You would think that with nothing int he stomach… lol Oh well!

I hope that you continue to improve and may all of us avoid any flare-ups!

Hugs,
Warren

#6

Hi Warren,

Thanks for your encouraging words. I’m sorry you are not feeling well. When we think we are doing well if not totally normal something close to it because I was able to do lot of things that I haven’t done recently and thought I won’t be able to do them in my life again. When I think OK I’m able to keep the pain under control even doing all these things then it comes and hits so bad as if saying, ‘No way, I didn’t go anywhere, I’m still here and I’m the one who controls your life.’ I’ll be in shock for a while and then get into questioning ‘Why,Why, Why me,’ and then later on accept it and say it is another episode it will pass. When I was in the questioning mood I posted the note asking for help. Yeah, I know every thing what to do to control my pain, what to think, what to do to divert my mind, but when you are so exhausted fighting with this ‘stupid thing,’ you’ll think I can’t deal with this on my own, I need my friends support. I never feel bad to ask help and I never go back to offer help too. You have been seeing me for so long, right, my dear friend.

I hope your physician will help you to control the throwing up and also ‘fun Steatorrhea’! Meanwhile just try to relax(I know it’s hard) but try to watch T.V. or listen to your favorite music and try to sing with it if you can, call your close friends and talk something else like about the news you read in the newspaper or about recent movies, if you are interested in the Oscar nominations, or sports etc. See how it goes and how you feel my friend. Weekends are hard because everybody will be busy with different things and to get hold of anyone is very hard.

Please, don’t think that when I’m having such bad experience she is giving all these stupid ideas for me. Some times I try these things and I get distracted by them. Especially I have good friends and talking to them I even laugh so loud forgetting about the pain. They know about me so well and they know if I call them I need to cheer up, I don’t call saying I’m in lot of pain unless it’s bad. We talk about kids activities and silly things they do and lot of stuff that goes on. Sometimes if I’m too emotional and feel like talking to one of my family members I call India and I let them tell all the things with their families or the parties they have attended, marriages in any families, if anyone is sick, those kind of things. I’ll just listen to them and if we come across some thing funny we get to laugh so much.

Sometimes I just cry and they don’t know what to do in the beginning, they must be crying the other side, but slowly they pull themselves and start telling something about my friends who came to visit them and how they talked about all my college days and how fun was to remember all those memories. They look at the photographs and it brings lot of memories and they miss me too. They know it’s just because of my treatment I’m here if some breakthrough comes up, or some medication which helps me to get off the tube feedings maybe I’ll return back. But they don’t understand that my kids are growing up and they are getting used to everything here, my son is going to college this Sept and my daughter is developing her friendships and just moving on with her talents in different fields and it will be hard for them to move.Anyway right now we are not thinking about it.I just wanted to get distracted if I talk about my things and you’ll also know how difficult it is for a person from different country to live with Chronic disease and miss all the family members.If you didn’t have the strength or thought and it is too much for you to read then I’M SORRY Warren.Hope you feel better, please remember I’m here for you if you need any kind of help and you are in my prayers and thoughts.

Lots of love and hugs,
Durga.

#7

Dear Durga and all:

We can all only do what we’re up to based on how we’re feeling at any given time, on any given day. We all have those “down” days where there’s just no way to do any more than we are doing.

Durga- I don’t think anyone expects any more of you-- we just miss you when you’re ‘gone’ for a while; but we understand and I hope you continue to take whatever time you need for yourself and for replying.

All the best to you and everyone here-- I hope everyone is having a better day!

Love and hugs,

Lisa