In denial or just numb

Breast Cancer
#1

I was diagnosed two weeks ago. I’ve been handling “my breast cancer” like some kind of project. I’ve only cried Two times. It’s like every thing is happening to someone else.

The second mammogram- the biopsy-the visit with the surgeon- looking the cancer up on the inter-net-telling the family and friends- setting up the second opinion- getting a surgery date- signing up for an on line support group- making a list of questions to ask the second DR.- making a list of things I can do when I’m to tired to do any thing-grocery shopping to stock up on convenience foods for when I can’t prepare food for my self.
When I tell a family member I tell them that the radiation is going to be more of a nuisance than any thing else.
I tell my self that I have to keep busy and get the house just so, because soon I won’t be able to move from the pain of the surgery
I tell my self get the spring cleaning out of the way because I’m going to be so tired from the radiation that I’m just going to stay in bed.
I feel in some way it’s happening to someone else. I’m just helping them out. I’m good at helping other people.
It’s not happening to me. not me. nothing this bad happens to me.
I have no control, I have no choice. I feel so alone.
Blu

#2

I believe what your experiencing is normal. I too felt seperated from my body and was just going threw the motions. I promise you it will get better its a coping mechanism that really gets you threw it. It will take time but you will prevail.

#3

hi there you are behaving normally.when i was diagnosed i was told and the next day i was operated on ,no time for my feet to touch the ground ,that was a shock to me and my family .but as time goes on and you get farther away you will be able to take it in more i searched the internet ,spoke to others as well ,contacted a support group ,but in the end you feel you are on your own ,YOU ARE NOT ,we are all in the same club ,i once read someone called it the sod it club and that about sums it up .i get tearful even now and im 18 months down the line so just take it in your stride .i also get busy around the house to keep my mind off my troubles but in the end i say what am i doing there are more important things to do in life take care .

#4

Thank-you for making me feel not so alone. Since I wrote this I’ve had a second opinion with the The Comprehensive Breast Center, The Breast Place for short. It’s a wonderful place where they treat you, mind and body. When I walked out of their door I did not feel alone any more. I felt well informed. I felt confident in the decision to go with them. Now I just want to get the surgery behind me.

#5

yes get the surgery behind you and then take time out for yourself ,the family can hold the reins for awhile they need to ,to feel part of it .try relaxation classes or even reiki its very relaxing but most of all just go with it dont run before you can walk so to speak take care i wish you all the best

#6

you wont be alone they are plenty of us out there ,im a cat person as well just love them keep in touch through out i will chat to you also try a support group or maybe a cancer helpline by talking to you it also helps me .by the way when i was diognosed i was in pieces and the nurse at the hospital said to me that she was diognosed 15 years ago and she was still here to tell the tale she said the advances in therapy now are much greater so i would have better treatment than she did so there hows that . all the best also maybe your social worker at your hospital may be able to get you some help bye for now

#7

your depressed because you are at home .i feel worse when im at home if you are out and about or keeping busy you dont think of it so much . when the weather is good you feel much better so try to do what you can and get out of the house when you can .put the music on LOUD and have a good dance around or get your pillow and scream into it the cats might think you have gone mad but so what .smile to yourself it works ive done it bye wishing you all the best , jenny

#8

Stress AND CANCER DO NOT GO TOGETHER. TRY TO THINK POSITIVE… GET ON THE INTERNET AND READ ALL YOU CAN. START AN HERBAL REGIMEN RIGHT AWAY. DON’T DEPEND ON YOUR MEDICAL DOCTOR TO TELL YOU TO DO THIS. YOU MUST CHANGE YOU DIET FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. TRY TO DO IT A QUICKLY AS YOU CAN BECAUSE IT IS A PROCESS. START ON ESSIAC TEA ASAP. GOOGLE HERBAL HEALER. GO ONTO THAT WEBSITE AND READ. GOOGLE NUTRI-FARMACY. GO ONTO THAT WEBSITE AND READ MORE.
DOWNLOAD THE FILE AND READ OVER IT.

STRESSING WILL NOT MAKE THE CANCER GO AWAY. ASK FOR PRAYER. GO ONTO PRAYINGFORYOU.COM AND FILL OUT A PRAYER REQUEST. PRAYER DOES CHANGE THINGS. GOD WILL GIVE YOU THE STRENGTH TO ENDURE.

E-MAIL AND LET ME KNOW HOW YOU ARE DOING.

MY SPIRITS REMAIN UP BECAUSE I KNOW THAT GOD WILL TAKE CARE OF ME. ALSO PRAY AND READ YOUR BIBLE DAILY. YOU WILL BE SURPRISED AT HOW THIS WILL RELAX YOU AND GIVE YOU PEASE OF MIND. IT WILL ALSO ENABLE YOU TO GET A GOOD NIGHTS SLEEP.

HAVE A BLESSED DAY,
PATSY

#9

Patsy12 is correct on everything. Do not expect your doctor to encourage you to change anything with diet, exercise, herbal supplements, vitamins, etc. Pray, and keep praying. I almost gave up on my faith, God, everything when I was told. I was sure that God was trying to take my family one by one. Two years ago, my 25 year old son was in a near fatal car accident. Six months later, my children’s father, my ex-husband, died of a massive heart attack at age 50. We we all in trauma. A year later, I was diagnosed with BC, and three months later my 22 year old daughter (who was given too much dosage of an anti-depressant to help her deal with the loss of her father - and now thinks that I’m next to die) fell asleep at the wheel and totaled her car. The only thing that I’m grateful for right now is this is happening to me and not to my children. I’m still dealing with so much anger and denial. It’s hard to stay positive at times, especially when you think of dying so young. If there is anything amazing out of this, it’s the fact that I’m not an animal lover at all. I swore to my dying day that I’d never have a four-legged creature step foot in my home. I always told people that you’ll know I’ve lost my mind when I buy a puppy. The sad part is, is that I know I’ve lost part of my mind over all this trauma. I feel as though someone has taken part of my brain, truly. Well, we bought a Bichon Havenese puppy, and I cannot believe how she has helped me. I had barely smiled, let alone laughed, since last July. I cannot imagine doing without her.

#10

One more thing - a friend gave me a book entitled,
“God Calling”. It’s such an incredible book and has
helped me so much to regain my faith. I purchased
it for four other friends of mine. I wish that I could
purchase it for all of my friends, but I’d go broke!

#11 
 I was trying to prepare everything, but not knowing what to expect. Getting ready for the surgery. Not knowing how much time I had. I found out my surgery date yesterday, it's the twentieth. Now that I know when. I relieved a little.  That's one big qusetion answered. I more than ready. If I'm not I have plenty of time to prepare myself.
I need to stay in the moment. I need to focus on what's happening today and not worry about tomorrow.   
 I've been dealing with depression for sixteen years or so now and It's been a roller coaster to say the least. But when I compare myself to Giovanna, My problems just doesn't seem so bad. I'm sorry for all the bad things that happened, give that puppy a hug from me.
Patsy, I'm going to Google those sites when I done answering my e-mails. 
Jenny, my cat's already think I'm nut's!!!
             Blu
#12

Hi BLu;

Tell me more about you cancer and the surgery you’ve elected to have.

I am here for you!

patsy12

#13

The cancer I have is Ductal carcinoma in-situ. From what I’ve read on these pages on this site I’m very lucky. It’s very treatable with surgery. I’m going to have a lumpectomy. The cancer on the mammogram shows it to be two and a half centimeters. The Doctor said she will take an additional two centimeters all the way around the whole thing. That will be biopsied. If that comes back with any cancer cells in it than back to the operating room (Not the same day). I may not need radiation. I will need to take a pill like Tamoxifen.
Because my cancer is :
Estrogen receptor: Positive in DCIS
Progesterone receptor: Positive in DCIS

I was taking Cenestin because I had a hysterectomy pill being a hormone causes the cancer to grow. Because it’s hormone positive. I had to stop taking them. Now I’m going through menopause. So I was researching something to take for menopause and found out the vitamins that I was taking that had Ginkgo and Ginseng, both could cause my cancer to grow. My doctor missed that. She is not up to date on herbs. I printed out a bunch of info for her on the herbs so she wouldn’t miss it again with someone else. I did find one I’m going to start taking after the cancer is gone. It’s called Macafem it’s a Non- Estrogenic herb. as to the Phytoestrogenic herbs that have recently questioned by doctors. http://herbs-for-menopause.com READ READ READ
Blu

#14

listen to this girls hope it brings a smile

                    WHY WORRY

THERE ARE ONLY TWO THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT,
EITHER YOU ARE WELL ,OR YOU ARE SICK,
IF YOU ARE WELL ,THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT BUT
IF YOU ARE SICK,THERE ARE TWO THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT,
EITHER YOU GET WELL OR YOU DIE,
IF YOU GET WELL ,THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT,
IF YOU DIE ,THERE ARE TWO THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT ,EITHER YOU GO TO HEAVEN OR HELL,
IF YOU GO TO HEAVEN ,THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT
BUT IF YOU GO TO HELL,YOU’LL BE SO DAMN BUSY SHAKING HANDS WITH FRIENDS ,
YOU WONT HAVE TIME TO WORRY.

#15

DCIS- is a precanerous condition; meaning stage 0. the cancer cells are contained withiin the duct.

Mine is invasive DC; meaning some of the cells are now outside the duct, stage 1. My receptor readings were negative on both counts. The size is the same as yours, not very big.

I have elected to have a masectomy for obvious reasons:

  1. didn’t to go back for addition surgery due to reocurrance
  2. did not want to go back and forth to have lymph nodes
    checked.
  3. did not want to take medication or expose my body to (6)
    week of daily radiation treatments.
  4. did not want to have a deformed breast due to
    lumpectony.

My plastic surgeon told me that doctors will always go for the breast conservation approach. But that comes with all the “did not wants” I’ve listed above.

This was my choice for my body. Everyone has to make the choice that is best for them.

Please continue to take care!

#16

Patsy Thank-you I’m am trying to take care of my self. I just can’t seem to give up the junk food. It helps me with the anxiety. I went to a HEALTH EXPO yesterday in North Hampton Mass. It was all Holistic. I’m planning on starting a Juice called GAC. lifepaxnano@yahoo.com Plan on going back to EXPO today.

#17

i’m an 8 yr. survivor of ductal cancer gramms

#18 
 Decided not to go with the GAC Juice. Gave the wrong website. Sorry.
 Went to Whole Foods and bought Noni Mangosteen Goji & Acai juice. Also Goji100 juice. Started to take both to boost immune system before surgery.
                                  Blu
#19

I am taking’ RED LIGHTNING’…It’s about $24.00 a bottle. it conains all yhe ingredients you mentioned, plus. Red berries contain a certian acid need to treat breast cancer. do some reading on this acic ‘ellagic acid’. Website to check out:

ellagicdiect.com
curewzone.com

cancertutor.com-contains alot of info so try to go directy to the ellagic acid info:

also check to “ORAC” O any whole food antioxiant you are taking. eg; " RED LIGHTLNING’ contains and orac vale of 4000 per serving=4capusules.

Happy reading,
patsy12

#20

Hi ladies:

Hope all is going well.

Last night I went to ny first cancer support group. What a dissappointment. Basic cancer info was given by a woman i am sure did not have any kind of cancer. She never dmentioned it anyway. A second goofy woman/nurse/leader talked mostly about herself anf her family. Did say she dod not have cancer, but her sister did along with some aunts (assumed because se referred to the old age, but never say yes or no as to whether they are cancer suvivors). i or none else was asked why we were there, a sign-up sheet was must passed around asking for our names address, and ph. number. They also gave a lot of info about osteoparosis, which I do have. This is supposed to be a Breast cancer support group. This is not what I expected. I expected a sort of round-table type discussion. We had not participation in the meeting at all. I will not go back to anymore of this group’s meetings. The kicker was when they passed around a bowl of chocolate hershey’s kisses. i was floored. i just left. noone realyy said good night to anyone, or an even a 'thanks foor comming".

i wil find another group o check out…

FYI-go onto the website:

jonbarron.org

Specifically TheBarron Report…sign up for the news letter. While on the s itelook at articles on “The Ultimate Antioxidant” talks about the ORAC HIGH N ANTIOXIDANTS AND THE ORAC (OXYGEN RADCAL ASORBANCE CAPACITY) I TALKED ABOUT YESTERDAY and ALSO READ: 'Green Tea Under Attack" .

This website illustrates had mainstream doctors and AMA are denial regarding alternate cancer treatment and it’s proven value.

Let me know if you like the website.

REMEMBER:
READ! READ! READ!..

patsy12