Was contacted by Oprah’s staff.
Thank you wholeheartedly for all your letters and support.
She wouldn’t have contacted me had it not been for you.
Will keep you posted.
Stay smart and credentialed (laughing).
Sam
Phoenix,
I really wish you would stop bullying ME by making false and ridiculous accusations just because I will not tell you what you want to hear.
GD
WHOOPS,
I didn’t realise you were THIS “Ella”
http://www.ellascottevolution.com/Index.aspx
With your very own self published book to hustle…
chuckles
OF COURSE you must keep Sam sweet…
GD
“The Lady doth protest too much, methinks” anyone can mock up figures…it even used to be Sam Vaknin’s day job at one time.
But if your vanity is REALLY worth $15,000 to you shrugs go for it…
This isn’t your site, and it isn’t Sam’s site…
Your “cause” is a cynical con that exploits vulnerable people for profit and other selfish gain.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder is a category of Mental Illness defined in the DSM IV TR by qualified clinicians, that, in academic and psychiatric terms does not even resemble Sam Vaknin’s abuse of the term, let alone yours.
GD
That is WONDERFUL SAM!!! WE ROCK!!!
On Oct 24, 2007, at 10:42 AM, samvaknin wrote:
Sam,
Like a lot of claims you have made over the years to have been contacted by people like Oprah and Dr Phil…
I will believe that when I see it…
GD
But Ella,
Don’t you think that the less BS from exploitative conmen like Sam, the MORE awareness there will be?
Rather than the other way around?
GD
This is terrific news! Congrats, Sam! This is a HUGE step in our efforts to build awareness about narcissism! We need to educate others so they know what to look for and what to avoid. There’s no reason our suffering should be in vain. We need to make something productive of our experience. Building awareness is one way I feel we can make a difference and feel that we didn’t suffer for nothing. At the end of the day, we can help educate others. Please keep us posted, Sam!!!
Hi Blitzen,
I’d just like to respond to your posts. I’ve put almost $15,000 into getting my book published so we can build awareness on the topic of narcissism. I don’t expect to be able to retire off any profits from my book. I’ll be lucky if I ever break even. I wrote my book because it was cathartic. I’ve always found writing to be a way to heal. I also wrote it because I figured there’s no reason what I went through should be in vain. I figured I might as well take my experience and turn it into something positive. I feel that perhaps I went through what I went through so I could educate and help others.
I’m 35 years old, unmarried with no children. At this age, you start to think about your purpose in life. I came to the conclusion a year ago when I started writing this book that perhaps my purpose in life is to help others. I’ve been facilitating a self-help group in my hometown of Chicago on a bi-weekly basis for three years now. It makes me feel good to help others. I believe if I can help one person as result of telling my story, what I have done will be worthwhile. May I ask what you have done to contribute to this cause?
I would encourage you not to make assumptions about others you don’t even know. I’m rather offended by your comments. As I’ve said before, this forum is a place we visit to get support from others…not to be ripped apart by people like you. If it makes you feel good to put down people like Sam and me for trying to help, I think you have other issues you need to work on.
I have actually read as much of you as I could stomach. I was horrified.
You do not even seem to have the first idea what “narcissism” as a concept actually IS.
You are just reinventing psychology to suit yourself and then trying to exploit others by selling it to them.
As for “$15,000” here is a site trying to sell themselves by presenting the cost of “Authorhouse” (where you self published), as high as they can,
http://www.dogearpublishing.net/whydogear-comparison-authorhouse.aspx
As you can clearly see, the highest cost they could come up with, including EVERYTHING, was $2180
GD
wow Blitzen
things have taken a turn for the worse.
I wish they hadnt.
I can’t believe I’m even acknowledging what you wrote to me, Blitzen, but I must. I don’t know what cracker-jack box you think you can write a book out of, but below is a summary of what I have spent publishing this book to date and I’m about to spend another $5k on it to update the cover and do some other things. Total spent to date, as you will see if you scroll to the bottom of my account statement, which I have copied and pasted below for your careful review, is $10,391.
Again, I must ask, what have you done to contribute to this cause? When you can answer that, I’ll stop asking you. Otherwise, please leave us alone. You have a completely different agenda than any of us on this site. Please find another site that wants to hear from haters and people like you that are so insecure all they can do is make fun of others. We can’t help you here. Your issues are far greater.
10/24/2007 Author Accounting Detail Report
- Please allow 24-72 hours for data on this report to synch with your account. Page 1 of 2
Author ID: 643265 Full Name: Ella Scott Total Balance: $0.00
7/12/2007 INV000025193 Galley Corrections 1.00 $43.00 $43.00 $43.00
7/12/2007 PYMNT000048477 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $43.00 $43.00
5/30/2007 PYMNT000043466 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $54.00 $54.00
5/24/2007 INV000022395 VSHACKE
LFORD
Fast Forword Service 1.00 $500.00 $500.00 $500.00
5/24/2007 INV000022395 VSHACKE
LFORD
Fast Forword Copy Editing 1.00 $984.00 $984.00 $984.00
5/24/2007 RFND000000520 VSHACKE
LFORD
Credit - Copy Editing 1.00 $1,752.00 $1,752.00
5/24/2007 PYMNT000043110 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $576.00 $576.00
5/24/2007 INV000022395 VSHACKE
LFORD
Add-On 1.00 $0.00 $0.00 $0.00
5/24/2007 INV000022395 VSHACKE
LFORD
Web Marketing Service B 1.00 $799.00 $799.00 $799.00
5/24/2007 INV000022395 VSHACKE
LFORD
Author Website renewal 1.00 $99.00 $99.00 $99.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Initial Contract 1.00 $0.00 $0.00 $0.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Google/Amazon Search
Program
1.00 $75.00 $75.00 $75.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Free Books Initial Contract 20.00 $0.00 $0.00 $0.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
New York Times Advertising 1.00 $2,650.00 $2,650.00 $2,650.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Booksellers Return Program 1.00 $699.00 $699.00 $699.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Expanded Publicity Package 1.00 $600.00 $600.00 $600.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Library of Congress Control
Number
1.00 $75.00 $75.00 $75.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Copy Editing 1.00 $1,752.00 $1,752.00 $1,752.00
4/30/2007 PYMNT000040191 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $6,899.00 $6,899.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Standard Paperback Publishing 1.00 $698.00 $698.00 $698.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Hardcover Distribution 1.00 $350.00 $350.00 $350.00
4/30/2007 INV000021186 VSHACKE
LFORD
Personalized Back Cover 1.00 $119.00 $119.00 $119.00 $0.00
Author Account Activity
Date Ref Number Sales Rep Description Quantity Rate
Extended
Price
Tax
Amount
Discount
Amount Total Charge
Payment
Amount Credit Memo
Refund
Amount
Entity: USA
10/24/2007 Author Accounting Detail Report - Please allow 24-72 hours for data on this report to synch with your account. Page 2 of 2
8/31/2007 INV000028317 JCOOPER Add-On 1.00 $0.00 $0.00 $0.00
8/31/2007 INV000028317 JCOOPER Front Page Initiative 1.00 $200.00 $200.00 $200.00
8/31/2007 PYMNT000054657 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $200.00 $200.00
8/27/2007 BO000023707 Shipping & Handling 1.00 $9.96 $9.96 $9.96
8/27/2007 BO000023669 Author Short-Run Book Sales 20.00 $17.99 $359.80 $17.99 $0.00
8/27/2007 BO000023707 Author Short-Run Book Sales 10.00 $12.56 $125.60 $7.85 $133.45
8/27/2007 PYMNT000053762 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $143.41 $143.41
8/27/2007 PYMNT000053724 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $9.95 $9.95
8/27/2007 BO000023669 Shipping & Handling 1.00 $9.95 $9.95 $9.95
8/16/2007 INV000027058 Galley Corrections 1.00 $33.00 $33.00 $33.00
8/16/2007 INV000026989 Galley Corrections 1.00 $45.00 $45.00 $45.00
8/16/2007 PYMNT000052269 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $33.00 $33.00
8/16/2007 PYMNT000052199 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $45.00 $45.00
7/31/2007 INV000026420 Galley Corrections 1.00 $165.00 $165.00 $165.00
7/31/2007 PYMNT000050826 American Express Payment
Received
1.00 $165.00 $165.00
$10,391.31 $7.85 $136.99 $9,920.36 $8,168.36 $1,752.00
Total Balance: $0.00
Date Ref Number Sales Rep Description Quantity Rate
Extended
Price
Tax
Amount $10,391.31
Discount
Amount Total Charge
Payment
Amount Credit Memo
Refund
Amount
Author Account Activity
Do you really think I could mock up figures like that in five minutes? It doesn’t matter. I don’t really care what you think. The song remains the same, my friend…what have you done to further this cause?
Ah, this plot thickens. It seems Ella and Sam have a thing going promoting each other. How interesting.
The following is one of Sam’s postings:
----- Original Message -----
From: Sam Vaknin author of "Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited"
To: Article Submit Narcissisticabuse ; Article Submit Toxic Relationships ; Article Submit Psychopathsgroup
Sent: Monday, September 24, 2007 1:16 PM
Subject: [narcissisticabuse] A Memoir and Guide to Understanding a Narcissist
For a first-hand account of what it’s like to be in a relationship with a narcissist, read Ella Scott’s new book titled When He’s Only Into Himself…A Memoir & Guide to Understanding a Narcissist, available on-line now via Amazon, Borders & Barnes & Noble.
Click here to visit Ella’s website/messageboard where you will find a forum of people discussing their experience of trying to love a narcissist.
Below is an excerpt from her book:
In my experience, a narcissist eventually becomes sarcastic and belittles you constantly. You begin to feel you can do nothing right in his eyes and your presence is hardly tolerable. You’re baffled. You wonder what you did wrong to cause such a drastic change in his feelings toward you. You struggle desperately to return things to the way they were in the beginning. Unfortunately, as hard as you try, things will never be the same again. It is a maddening and precarious way to live. It can drive anyone to the edge of their sanity.
In his book Malignant Self-Love – Narcissism Revisited, Vaknin does an excellent job of describing how a narcissist abuses his victim when he writes: “He infiltrates her defenses, shatters her self-confidence, confuses and confounds her, demeans and debases her. He invades her territory, abuses her confidence, exhausts her resources, hurts her loved ones, threatens her stability and security, involves her in his paranoid states of mind, frightens her out of her wits, withholds love and sex from her, prevents satisfaction and causes frustration, humiliates and insults her privately and in public, points out her shortcomings, criticizes her profusely and in a “scientific and objective†manner – and this is a partial list. Very often, the narcissist acts sadistically in the guise of an enlightened interest in the welfare of his victim. He plays the psychiatrist to her psychopathology (totally dreamt up by him). He acts the guru to her need of guidance, the avuncular or father figure, the teacher, the only true friend, the old and the experienced. All this in order to weaken her defenses and to lay siege to her disintegrating nerves. So subtle and poisonous is the narcissistic variant of sadism that it might well be regarded as the most dangerous of all†(Vaknin, 2006).
http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/
Buy Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited - the PRINT and e-BOOK editions as well as 7 other e-books about relationships with abusive narcissists - click on this link:
http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/thebook.html
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http://ceeandbalkan.tripod.com
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To join this list - go here:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/narcissisticabuse/
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http://groups.yahoo.com/group/toxicrelationships/
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Download free e-books
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,.,_
Ms. Ella,
If you spent $15,000 getting a book published, than you are not very bright. Blixen is right, it costs a fraction of that. It can be done for even less than $2800. Why in the world would anyone spend that much money publishing a book? It would certainly be hard to ever recoup it. But than maybe you did not write it and sell it for money. Maybe you just did it for the benefit of mankind. So why are you not giving them way?
I wonder if we have another pathological liar working this board.
susiejo
How long will you be staying, is this a fly by or permanant home for you?
Do you know what is weirding me out Susie?
It’s this constant “What-have-you-done-to-further-his-cause” chant…
Like something out of the Moonies…
Hey, do you know about that?
Sam used to be with the Moonies…and still is, in a way…see this Sam’s last job:
http://web.archive.org/web/20070710181726/http://eastwestcoms.com/East-West-professionals.htm Thomas Cromwell is practically “second in command” in the Moonies…
But he seems to have got the can since July cos he is gone from the current page…
Then if you look at his CV
http://samvak.tripod.com/cv.html
UPI is owned by the Moonies
Middle East Times is owned by the Moonies
Washington Times is owned by the Moonies
Professors for World Peace is a branch of the Moonies
He doesn’t seem to have much else on his CV except self published and/or free web content sites since he came out of the Israeli “State School for Prison Wardens”.
Bit scary isn’t it?
GD
OMG, I should have guessed it. A Moonie of all things. I like the part how he has consulted blue chip companies in Israel. I wonder what that would be for? How to recognize and diagnosis psychopaths in their employment?
Wow, this is really upsetting. I joined this site to be of support to others, not to hurt them. Telling me I’m not bright and a pathological liar is really cruel.
Why am I not giving the books away? Because I spent almost $15k to have my voice heard. I need to recoup some money. It’s a pretty basic principle.
As to the claim that I spent $15k on my vanity, if that’s the case, why am I using a pen name and why is there no “About the Author” on my book or website? I don’t have a picture of myself anywhere on my book.
As for slandering the men from my past, if you read the book, you would see that’s not the case. I don’t know why you’re commenting on something you haven’t read. My ex-husband signed a waiver in which I agreed to remove anything from the book he didn’t like or was offended by. I changed all names and even the location of my story to protect his anonymity.
You don’t know me at all so please stop trying to pass judgment on me.
Ella,
You are just here trying to use and exploit vulnerable people with your self published book.
Whether that is to gratify your own ego, or to “lay at the feet of Master Samvak”, or both I really do not care.
GD