Projections according to a book I have ‘Resolving Conflict’ A Practical Approach, 2nd Edition by Gregory Tillet, Oxford. Projections are the expectations and fears of the participant: what they believe may be the outcome of the conflict and of any resolution process; both in terms of what they hope to achieve, what they think they may achieve, and (often more importantly) what they fear they may lose. Negative projections are what restrain individuals in conflict from working towards a resolution.
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In Projection, the individual places responsibility for the unpleasant situation or conflict onto someone or something else. It often involves ‘victim talk’, in which the individual emphasises that he or she is the victim of someone else who is doing something over which the individual has no control. At an extreme level, this leads to an obsession with conspiracy theory or the belief that everyone in a particular situation ( or, in extreme cases, everyone in the world ) is out to get the individual, and sometimes leads to paranoia ( in the sense of the world). It is rarely effective to argue against or present facts disapproving the projection; it is more effective to demonstrate to individuals that accepting responsibility for the situation will also assist them to bring about positive change.
Displacement
In Displacement, the individual’s suppressed anger is directed at the wrong person. This often occurs when the real problem is a person whose power and status is such that the individual feels helpless to deal directly with him or her.
Attacking someone powerless may be a mechanism adopted to vent the anger aroused by someone else who is very powerful.
Initiating strong conflict with a co-worker may be a means of displacing a conflict against the an employer.
Displaced conflict usually occurs when the expression or acting out of the conflict in one location is perceived to be too dangerous; the conflict is then expressed or acted out in another, presumably safer, location.
An obvious example is the work/home division: an employee who is angry with her or his manager may assume (unconsciously or consciously) that there is high risk in expressing this anger to the person concerned in the workplace.
But the anger ----- and the conflict that provokes the anger ---- is not simply resolved as a result. It is most likely to be expressed in the home , where it is assumed(again, consciously or unconsciously) that there is minimum danger. A similar situation is observed with children who are angered or frightened by behaviour (including abuse) in the home: they may act out their conflict and anger in the classroom, where the consequences are almost certainly less painful. Effective conflict analysis can assist in identifying conflict that is displaced. In some cases , assisting an individual to find appropriate and effective means to reducing the stress and tension that apparently unresolvable conflict produces, without trying to force them to deal directly with the cause of the conflict, will enable them to discuss what is really happening.
Hey guys some of this is not relevant to NPD’s but I thought it maybe useful knowledge.
This book talks about when a person lives out scripts of fantasy so much that they eventually cannot distinguish the fantasy from reality. They live out these fantasy scripts to avoid unpleasant reality.
One characteristic effect of strongly felt unresolved conflict is an almost obsessive process of thought whereby the conflict, and incidents related to it , are 'replayed ’ in the mind.
Regression manifests in an individual who returns to childhood behaviour , and may include irrational anger , the throwing of tantrums, exaggerated tears, or refusing to speak. Regression can sometimes be dealt with by behaviour nomination ( that is , by describing to the individual what i s happening ) or by palying a particular role ( for example, taking on the parent role and acting the toward the individual as if he or she is a ‘naughty child’). Obviously , not all expressions of anger or all tears are regressive; they are often normal reactions to emotional stress. But where particular behaviour is repeated ( for example, where the individual bursts into tears every time a particular matter is mentioned) , it may be a manifestation of a defence mechanism and an indication that the subject is threatening.
The most informing book I have read yet about Narcissism is
’Malignant Self Love’
Narcissism Revisited
by Sam Vaknin
He explains every detail of how they work, think, absolutely everything you want to know about them.
I do apologise for getting carried away here and have bored you to pieces.
Must fly, bye for now Angelina